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Leprosy? Try These Essential Oils!

Essential Oils will cure you up real good Tired of hunks of your body falling off? Don't go to the doctor! Our diligent researchers scoured the web for a few minutes and put together a list of essential oils you can probably use to cure up your leprosy real fast.


Frankincense smells warm and nice, and it may be applied topically to the skin to rejuvenate cells and repair scar tissue, probably. It possibly also cures asthma and bronchitis.

Oregano Oil

Oregano oil might have antibacterial and anti-fungal properties, so it'll probably kill off your leprosy in no time! It might also cure asthma and multiple sclerosis. Just a few drops in a water mist might do it!

Lavender Oil

This essential oil could have anti-inflammatory and sedative properties that can help manage the symptoms of leprosy. It'll also maybe treat asthma, ADHD, stress, depression, and toenail fungus.

Thyme and garlic oil

Thyme and garlic oil could possibly be powerful antibacterial agents, so it stands to reason so just a few drops will almost certainly cure your leprosy! It goes without saying they could also possibly be used to treat asthma, AIDS, cancer, depression, anxiety, ADD, ADHD, HGTV, beer belly, vampirism, and political correctness.

Any other essential oil, ever

In our research, we found an oil for every condition! In fact, pretty much any oil seems to cure anything!

Though the lack of randomized clinical studies prevents us from officially claiming essential oils cure or treat any disease, random web testimonials and personal anecdotes should be good enough for you when it comes to your health!

So anyway, I hope this list helps at least a few people out there maybe get the help they need. If you need any samples let me know!

2016-07-03 #satire   #science   #health