"Sports": a one-sided conversation

Person: Oh, you live in [city]? I bet you [sports joke about city team].

Me: <confused look>… Oh, I don't really follow sports.

Person: Yeah, [additional sports joke about city team].

Me: Yeah? Is that so? I never pay much attention to sports.

Person: [anecdote about city sports team from 20 years ago].

Me: Yeah, um, [other topic].

Person: [comparison to other city sports team].

Me: … [fakes aneurysm] …