Big Fat Man Sues Self For Being Such A Dumbass: The OnlineNewspaper Gazette/ONG/quaap.com

Posted: Sun Aug 11 2002
Big Fat Man Sues Self For Being Such A Dumbass

A man has sued himself, claiming he became obese and suffered from other serious health problems from not being smart enough to eat anything besides fatty fast food cuisine.

Julius Carpenter, 58, filed the lawsuit Wednesday in Bronx Supreme Court, claiming the food at McDonald's, Wendy's, Burger King and Kentucky Fried Chicken was full of fat, and he should have known better.

"They said '100% beef.' I thought that meant it was good for you," explained Carpenter. "I thought the food was OK. Can you believe how stupid I was?"

Carpenter, who weighs 272 pounds, has had two heart attacks, has diabetes, high blood pressure , high cholesterol, and an IQ of 25.

"Those people in the advertisements don't really tell you what's in the food," he said. "It's all fat, fat and more fat. Now I'm obese. Jesus, am I an idiot or what?."

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