Posted: Mon May 21 2001
New Study Shows Apathetic People Don't Care.

A recent study shows that of those people who consider themselves to be "apathetic", almost 98 percent declined to answer the rest of the questions.

This was the result of an ambitious 3-day, 4.5 billion dollar study conducted by the Institute for Conducting Research with Government Grants (ICRGG).

"This was ground-breaking work, nothing like this had ever been done before, at least not with this much money anyway," says ICRGG chief Scienceguy Edward Whittle. "This is the first hard evidence, involving goverenment money, that shows, quite plainly, that apathetic people don't care."

Dr Whittle goes on, "Sure, there have been other studies that claim to show the same thing, but this is the first real research done on the topic. The others did not, I repeat not, use any government money, so how can you trust them?"