Surge In Patriotism Linked To "God Bless The USA": The OnlineNewspaper Gazette/ONG/quaap.com

Posted: Sun Oct 28 2001
Surge In Patriotism Linked To "God Bless The USA"

Spurred by the recent increase in acts of patriotism, a jointly appointed House committee has determined that the recent surge in patriotism and religiosity is caused by Lee Greenwood's hit "God Bless the USA".

The song, first released some time ago, has always been popular with 4th of July celebrations and the Midwest. The committee determined that an additive effect exists with the song; that is, hearing the song once produces a little patriotism, several more times and an explosion of patriotism results, the only outlet for which is passing around email jokes about Osama bin Laden and displaying flags. "This would have occurred in the absence of the September 11 attacks," says the committee chairman, "it's just good news for Lee Greenwood that the attacks happened to speed up the process."

--Chris Famunda

An OnlineNewspaper from Overland Park, Kansas "The stories are real. Only the names, facts and events have been changed." quaap.com \| Main Page \| World \| U.S. \| Local \| Business \| Sci-tech \| Investigative \| Entertainment \| Lifestyles \| Sports \| Interviews \| Editorials
Next Issue: Nation Goes on Double Super Secret Alert Driver Glared At 'Crocodile Hunter' killed by mild fall Fred Durst Given 'Coolest Guy in the World Award' by Mother Hotdogs Eaten With Relish George Carlin Fails to Note Irony of Title "Counter-Culture Icon" Casual Day at Nudist Colony Fails Current: China Explodes In Nuclear Fireball, Snipers Face Uncertain Charges Not A Lot Of Eye Contact At Andes Crash Survivors Reunion Cow Shit Found To Be "100% Organic" Everybody's Just Too Sensitive Mediocre Musician Five New Religious Denominations Created No One Talking About Failed Wonder Diet Offbeat: Man Dies In Humorous, Painful Accident	Posted: Sun Oct 28 2001 Surge In Patriotism Linked To "God Bless The USA" Spurred by the recent increase in acts of patriotism, a jointly appointed House committee has determined that the recent surge in patriotism and religiosity is caused by Lee Greenwood's hit "God Bless the USA". The song, first released some time ago, has always been popular with 4th of July celebrations and the Midwest. The committee determined that an additive effect exists with the song; that is, hearing the song once produces a little patriotism, several more times and an explosion of patriotism results, the only outlet for which is passing around email jokes about Osama bin Laden and displaying flags. "This would have occurred in the absence of the September 11 attacks," says the committee chairman, "it's just good news for Lee Greenwood that the attacks happened to speed up the process." --Chris Famunda Tweet	New Content Current: Oct 27 2002 Past Issues: Sep 29 2002 Sep 2 2002 Aug 11 2002 Jul 22 2002 Jun 30 2002 Jun 24 2002 May 29 2002 May 25 2002 May 19 2002 Apr 14 2002 Mar 10 2002 Feb 24 2002 Feb 10 2002 Jan 27 2002 Jan 14 2002 Dec 31 2001 Dec 2 2001 Nov 19 2001 Nov 4 2001 Oct 28 2001 Oct 13 2001 Oct 4 2001 Sep 26 2001 Sep 10 2001 Aug 23 2001 Aug 14 2001 Jul 31 2001 Jul 15 2001 June 2001 May 2001 Email this page quaap.com Privacy Contacts Schemes: Classic: B&W: Blue: DarkBlue: Red: DarkRed: Green: DarkGreen: Violet: DarkViolet:
	The OnlineNewspaper Gazette. All text © Copyright 2001-2004 Thamus.org, 2005 quaap.com. This is a parody and satire site: it's fake. This site contains no real facts or information. If you think you found a fact, you are mistaken. Never believe anything you read in onlinenewspapers. All non-public names are invented: Any resemblance to actual people may be considered "freaky", but is purely coincidental.* If you are not at least 18, please try not to understand anything you read. *Disclaimer © 2001-2002 Thamus.org, quaap.com.